by Bee Quammie

Dear J,

On June 21, 2014, life as we knew it shifted, ballooned, and took on new shape. Our daughter burst into the world accompanied by the summer solstice sunrise, bringing with her the gift of new identities for the two of us. Taking on the roles of mother and father, we were immediately thrust into on-the-job training with this beautiful brown baby as our only guide.

Blogger turned Author Doyin Richards is on a mission to change the way we think and talk about fatherhood. His first book, Daddy Doin' Work: Empowering Mothers to Evolve Fatherhood, is in stores now. I spoke with Doyin about his stereotypes about black dads and what we can do to not only change the conversation but change some of the potentially destructive family dynamics.

I'm a self-proclaimed daddy's girl. My most vivid, early childhood memories are those of my father gently caressing my hair and telling me how pretty it was and then gifting to me brown dolls that I was supposed to love just as much as he loved me. After over a year of therapy, tearful nights and long adult conversations with him, I can truthfully say that my father was my first love and my first heartbreak.