Things Every Black Woman in Her 20s Deserves to Hear

by Tabia Alexine for Blavity

Below is a must-read list of things all Black women don't hear often enough, based off of the many others like it that simply miss the mark. If you’re sick of lists for women that exclude any of us not living storybook perfect lives, this one’s for you.

1. Love yourself while empowering and turning up for your sisters and brothers, elders and youngsters who are working to make the world a better place to exist in.

2. Realize we often gotta WERQ twice as hard (for half as much).

3. Don’t let invisible privilege, daily systematic/institutionalized/social micro- and macro-aggressions of racism, sexism, bigotry, supremacy, misogyny among other oppressive realities keep you from being great. Recognize that it’s real and okay to feel like #YouJustCantWithTheWorld on certain days.

4. Feel empowered not to mess with people at times. “Me time” is important.

5. Get that .78 cents to a man’s dollar (read: money). #GirlsJustWannaHaveFunds.

6. Don’t let people refer to you as sassy, especially in a professional space. It’s a racially-charged label rooted in a stereotype, oftentimes reserved for black women. Women of color in the workplace who are assertive are NOT being sassy. They’re being assertive.

7. Do you at all times and realize that some people make it their full-time job to hate and troll. With a select few putting in mad overtime because they’re THAT serious about the haterade. Don’t let anybody keep you down.


8. Know and get to know your body just as anyone and everyone should.

9. #BlackLivesMatter.

10. DO YOU, BOO BOO. But if you still have a ring-back tone, maybe consider letting that one go…



11. Start building credit when you can. It’s helpful (if not lowkey necessary) to have a credit history that’s in good standing when the time comes  to take that next financial step. Watch out for high APRs, annual fees, companies that don’t give you permanent rewards and an introductory 0% APR rate. Do not be swindled!

12. Read. Watch. Share. Listen. Listen. Listen. Consume. Create. Question.

13. Work on your comedic/conversational timing. It comes in handy during small-talk situations. For example this would come in handy when just you and one other person are on the elevator and it’s someone you know or have seen around, and you’re like “Oh snap — should I say something? Because I kind of want to…. Nah, I’ll just look at my phone or act like I’m alone,” even though there’s somebody right next to you potentially thinking the same thing and there’s no kind of elevator music playing in the background because (much like ring-back tones) places finally realized that ish was wack.

This post was originally published by Blavity and part of it been republished here, with permission from the author. Click here to read the rest!

Photo: Shutterstock

Tabia Alexine is originally from Omaha, NE, and graduated from Washington University in St. Louis, where she studied Women’s Studies and Writing. She currently works at a talent agency in Los Angeles. Tabia enjoys discovering new creatives, connecting talent for collaboration, and building brands. Follow her on Instagram: @TabiAlexine.